Is it immature? Certainly. Is it worth the time and energy expended? Certainly not. So then, why? Why do I keep going through these fruitless endeavors? It's not for validation (or at least, I don't think so). It isn't going to change that individual's views. Because really, when has someone ever admitted to being wrong on twitter or facebook? I've got one theory about it though. I do it out of a sense of mass self-loathing. Depression and an atmosphere of ignorance about it helped foster those feelings. It's hard for someone that doesn't have depression to understand what its like. I realize that's a rather banal and somewhat trite statement, but that doesn't mean it lacks truth.
Regardless, over the past few years, I've come to recognize the aforementioned flaw as something to improve upon. Maybe the best way to describe it is like an internal game of tug of war. Sometimes I'm doing good, sometimes it's all I can do to avoid that giant puddle of mud.
This is the point in which I considered deleting all of this because it sounds the incoherent ramblings of a late twenty something male narcissist. Maybe it is.
Recently though, I've become more willing to open up to people and let them see the inner workings of my (disturbed?) mind. (No, really, if you knew half of the things I laugh about, you'd think there was something seriously wrong with me.)
Getting back to my original point, I try to pick my battles better these days. Not for the sake of argument, but to promote a higher level of discourse and critical thinking. That matters. It matters even in the mundane, average day of a mundane, average person.
